Facerollers the Stars are Not

Yeah, I'll tell you how we got here in a minute.

As usual, I rolled up to my guild's weekly classic raid alongside my faithful healer and his wife, our short, bearded shadow priest. We three, the tall, noble paladin, all clad in shining armor; the even taller, savage night elf, scarred from countless battles and chafing to leave her humanoid form; and the portly dwarf, robed in shadows like black silk and sipping happily at a hipflask; stood around the summoning stone and twiddled our collective thumbs.

I mean, it was 4 hours before the raid, but come on? Slackers!

Our super hunters (one of them came on her druid alt) showed up at the prescribed time, and eventually so did the 2nd to last of the 80s in the guild, a boomkin.

/shudder

Yeah, I know the Stars are, err, a bit tiny. But we like 6 manning stuff! It's fun!



We kicked butt and took names in Gruul's Lair under our superb leadership (done by yours truly). I had PUGed it once with Laia, and let me tell you, 6 organized, intelligent guildies are far, far more effective than 25 overgeared morons. The super hunter's druid was a semi-offtank to help me control the Council's adds.

We shot them until they died and went on to ze big bad himself, Gruul the Oddly Articulate. His voice acting is weird. He sounds like a CEO.

I checked the clock and it had only been 20 minutes, so I shepherded the guildies to Magtheridan's Lair. I conveniently forgot that all the trash you left uncleared added with the boss. Nonetheless, since I checked to make sure everyone was inside before I pulled (an extremely important tool in any raid leader's arsenal) we slaughtered them all with lots of AOE.

Now, after this, it was only 5'oclock. "Hmmm," thought your humble author.

"Should we try to 6man VoA or do Tempest Keep?" I asked my gleeful guildies, who were cheering our leet hunter's druid on as she stuck Maggy's head on a stake outside of Honor Hold.

"YES YES YES!" was what I deciphered from frenzied joyous screaming in raid chat. So, badge epix in hand, we trundled off to pay a visit to Kael. Al'ar actually killed me with Flame Quills! /shock/horror/disbelief

We didn't get the mount to drop, either. Of course, the great part about having 3 druids in a 6man raid is there is a lot of Brezzes. Battle resurections* for the druidic abbreviation impaired. Our sole healer had us all stand between Void Reaver's ginormous tootsies and take the Pounding damage rather that watch the DPS run around like headless chickens dodging orbs. Solarian killed Pilaser when our id-beloved boomkin blew her up with Wrath of the Astromancer. Those lazerchickens. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Then, we come to Kael, and I'm feeling pretty cocky. Phase 1 goes by without a hitch. Phase 2, fairly the same, aside from me frantically screaming for the boomkin to grab the legendary staff.

But Phase 3, where the four cronies of Kael all come at you at once...

Wipe.

Wipe.

Wipe.

Then one time we got to Phase 4!

Only healer mindcontrolled.
Boomkin with staff that prevents disorientation mindcontrolled.
Say it with me, my dears.

Wipe.

Wipe.

Wipe.

I bow before you, Kael'thas Sunstrider, and your infuriating mechanics that really need more than 6 people.


And of course, your fabulous hair.